There/There Brings Oakland's Beloved Queer Bar Back to Life

Every once in a while a small neighborhood spot closes and the whole community feels it. That is what happened at the end of 2025 when Friends and Family, a beloved queer bar in Uptown Oakland, shut its doors. The closure brought out heartfelt tributes from longtime regulars who described the space as irreplaceable. I wanted to share some good news for anyone who felt that loss, because the space did not stay empty for long. There/There has taken its place, and it is carrying the spirit of that community forward.

The Story Behind There/There

There/There is the creation of Alli Li, who was actually the original chef at Friends and Family before opening this new bar in the same address. Li watched the outpouring of grief when the old bar closed and decided to bring the space back to life rather than let that connection to the community disappear. A GoFundMe campaign helped get things off the ground, with Li describing the goal simply: reopening the space with a bit of a different focus, more centered on the bar itself, while keeping the same warmth that made the original spot special.

The name is a nice touch too. It plays on Li's pronouns, they and them, and it is also a nod to Oakland novelist Gertrude Stein's famous line, "there is no there there." It is a clever way of honoring both Li's identity and Oakland's own literary history in one name.

Location and Ownership

There/There is located at 468 25th St in Uptown Oakland, in the same space that housed Friends and Family. It is owned and run by Alli Li, who serves as chef-owner. Li has deep roots in the local food and bar scene, having also spent time at Daytrip Counter before returning to this space to open There/There.

Food and Drink

There/There offers an affordable cocktail menu alongside a full nonalcoholic menu, so it is a welcoming spot whether or not you are drinking. The bar built its reputation on a serious cocktail program without losing its neighborhood, low pressure feel. Food is part of the experience too, continuing a tradition that made the previous iteration of the space a James Beard semi-finalist for outstanding bar and a spot on the inaugural North America's 50 Best Bars list. One small but memorable specialty on the menu is a caviar bump, a fun and approachable way to add a little indulgence to a night out.

Atmosphere and Friendliness

This is where There/There really shines. It operates Tuesday through Saturday with a wide variety of community events, from weeknight artist talks and a chess club to weekend dance parties. The back patio recently got a fun update too, with new bleachers that Li has affectionately nicknamed the cruising corner, meant to give friends and couples a cozy spot to pile up together outside.

Regulars describe There/There as a true neighborhood bar rather than a destination cocktail spot chasing attention. The lighting, the noise level, and the pace of the room are all built for conversation and for staying a while. Weekday evenings in particular are said to bring out the best version of the bar, when the room is a little quieter and the staff have more time to connect with each person who walks in.

Why It Matters

Oakland's queer nightlife scene lost something significant when Friends and Family closed, and There/There is proof that community can rebuild what feels irreplaceable. Alli Li took on the responsibility of continuing that legacy, and from everything I have read, they are doing it with care. If you are ever in Uptown Oakland and looking for a warm, unpretentious place to spend an evening, There/There sounds like a wonderful spot to support.